Since I have resolved no longer to make resolutions, and since I am a type-A kind of a girl, I think I will write out some of my flexible goals for the year, knowing that if I fail one day, I can just keep working toward something worthwhile. The goals, therefore, are about moving directionally, and less about finishing accomplishments.
Elissa's 2010 directional goals
1. to make this year the "year of the friend." I have always loved those charts with birth years at Chinese restaurants, mostly because I love the tiny pictures (I might not like it so well if I was a rat instead of a horse). The Chinese feel perfectly free to define each birth year by different sets of characteristics. If my last year had to be categorized, it have been "the year of constant and earthshaking change." As far as I can tell, this year, I will not live in four different houses (last year's record), and I will neither move across an ocean or across a continent; so, this year, I intend to make relationships my priority.
Having been in Oz for a year, and in Brisbane for six months, I am nearing mastery on most of the small tasks that consumed the majority of my time during my "year of change". I am over the initial loneliness and the culture shock ( though I still have my moments). I can now locate cocoa powder and Copha (a Crisco substitute for you Yanks), and I have very few problems driving on the left side of the road--Greg would beg to differ, but he makes me nervous and I drive poorly when he is in the car. Being mostly settled in culture and location, it is now time to focus on building lasting friendships, because having friends with whom to share life makes the good things better and the hard stuff easier.
I guess I have been thinking about investing more in my friendships here because Greg and I are planning a trip back to the states. In ten months I will again set foot on American soil to enjoy time with my family and my old friends. In my home-comimg fantasies, everyone I love is waiting outside of customs with signs and tears; they have all been waiting and pining outside the airport for years in my absence (w0uldn't it be nice to be missed that much?) But, in reality, all my friends stateside are normal and healthy enough not to let their lives stop just because I have moved away. The friendships that count stateside are lifetime friendships, whose love will weather the separation. If I were to spend this year pining for "home," family, and my dear old friends in a fantasy world that does not exist, many months would be wasted, and I would be very sorry to return Oz this time next year, having squandered time that could have been invested in relationships here. No, instead, I am determined to make this year count. I belong here, for the time being, in Australia, so making good friends here is really just another way of making Australia my home.
2. to refrain from being perpetually busy with good things--to be un-busy. I think women in general and Christian women in particular are powerfully afflicted with business. I, myself, have been busy for most of my adult life, trying to cram too much stuff into too little time, trying to do all the things that might go undone if I didn't attempt them. I suppose some women can maintain busy schedules without neglecting their families, but I am not one of those women. No, when I get too busy, I am not kind or attentive enough to the people that matter most to me, and that is just plain wrong.
I recognize that in some seasons, busyness is unavoidable, but generally, I have a choice about whether or not I am going to place stress on myself by trying to book too much in, even, or maybe especially "good" activities like volunteering at school or helping at church. I want this year to be about relationships, and that means leaving "blank" time to chat over a cuppa (cup of coffee or tea), or days where nothing is scheduled so that I can have friends over. Unbusyness means saying "No" even when I feel obligated to answer otherwise. Unbusyness clears my schedule and my mind so that I have time for people.
3. To keep reading through the Bible. I am a hard-core Christian, the kind that believes that God has a plan for the universe, the earth, and our individual lives in particular, the kind that believes in redemption and miracles and that God might actually care to know me personally(and everyone else too). I see the Bible, not as a rule book, but as a (very long) memo from God to me, and reading it as a way to know and experience all that God is.
About ten years ago, I started to read through the bible on one of those horrible "Through-the-Bible-in-a-Year" reading plans. I have quit the plan about six times in six of the last years feeling terribly defeated. I think it is intellectually dishonest to say I believe the Bible without having read all of it, but I honestly cannot keep up with a super-intense reading plan while changing diapers, cooking dinners, and generally trying to be a loving wife and mother. I know those plans work for some super-structured folks, but the "one-year-plan" has far too little grace in it for an artsy girl like me.
So, I am coming up with the "ten-ish-year-Bible-reading-plan." I'm about halfway through the Good Book, so maybe this year I will make it through the hard-to-understand books to the books I like most, the ones where Jesus does away with rule-keeping legalism (like trying to read a very deep two thousand page book in a year) and rewards those who come in faith. If I finish the Bible this year, I will be stoked, but I am calling my plan the "ten-ish-year-plan" just in case I need a little more grace, like I usually do.
At the end of the year, I hope I will have spent my time wisely, investing in the people that live their lives around me. I hope I will have friends in Australia that I will miss and that will miss me when I go to the states for the holidays. I hope I live the year set free from busyness, leaving most of the busywork around Mitchelton for people that get can manage busyness and family commitments. I hope I will know the character of God better because I have finished his memo by the end of the year, but, these are my "directional goals" not resolutions. Maybe this year, unlike years past, when I fail, I can just keep on plugging without giving up. Maybe this year will finally be the year when I get a firm handle on handing out grace to the person I know who needs it most--myself.
